I Am Art

The fun part

*Recently I have been working on some commissioned art  projects for corporate clients. One of the duties of that job is being sworn to secrecy for months and that is a hard thing. The fun part is starting to happen~ I'm starting to see some of it pop up in unexpected places! One collection is now available at AllPosters.com at really good prices.  I think it is important that a variety of styles of art be available at all price points so I am thrilled that is happening.
See the collection here.

*There's a cute article where Karen and I are are quoted about art journaling along with artist Kelly Kilmer here. As you'll see, Kelly was the victim of The Curse Of The Extra Vowel this time. So fun! Always, always, always a good sign. Signed copies of Journal Revolution are available in my etsy shop.

*Remember Little Orphan Annie? One of the photos I licensed last year was the one of her with Buddha. I found it here at Successories! Annie is now a motivational poster. That's funny and sweet at the same time. Her spirit lives on and is customizable!

we really need to know

Has anyone started using the Snuggie their friends got them as a joke gift yet? You know, in the privacy of your own home, maybe even while you are reading this? You can confess here. We totally would. Of course, the Snuggie would backfire on us and we'd trip over it and break something important like a hip.
We like infomercial products, especially The Snackmaster. Oh! That sideways slide in paper booties exercise thing was really fun, too. Dangerous, but really fun.
Alright, fess up.

Winners and lunch and saving money

The Fed Ex man brought me a nice big box of books today! I took the books out, wrote down all your names on the candy bar wrappers that were piling up on my desk, then tossed them in the box. These are the winners I pulled out with my eyes closed:
Diane Long and her Mac N Cheese win a signed copy of Meeting In The Ladies Room!
Thien-Kim and her multiple soups and salads win her choice of any print from my shop!
Thanks to everyone for sharing your lunch with us. This weekend we finally got to have a treat we've been longing for~ the cream cheese pretzels at Disneyland. And even better, we got to have them with The Happy Hooker, her lovely daughter, and her Mom who makes excellent spaghetti sauce. I'd like one of those pretzels dipped in the spaghetti sauce for lunch a few times a week, that's for sure.

I hate to sound like one of those people who never shuts up about about one topic (um wool, except food and Neil Diamond) but I hate to pay full price on anything and if I can save YOU money, I most certainly will. There is still time to save $10 on Meeting In The Ladies Room. The sale lasts only until 12/31 so you must hurry. GO HERE TO ORDER.
Orders from the US (using US $):   GREATGIFT
Orders from UK (using UK £):   GREATGIFT2
Orders from EU (using EU €):   GREATGIFT3
Orders from AU (using AUD $):   GREATGIFT4
CANADIAN BUYERS: use code GREATGIFT. Blurb.com only accepts those 4 currencies so select $US for your discount.

We'll be having a new contest next week with prizes from Ladies Room Book participants!

*That is me and The Happy Hooker (BellaKarma on twitter) in a bathroom made especially for tall people like us.

prizes, music, and things

Thanks so much for sharing your lunch with us! We always love to read what you're eating. I wrote down all your names on little pieces of paper while alternately popping Wheat Thins smothered in cream cheese in my mouth (I got re-addicted). Suki was happy to pick the winners because she loves to eat bite-sized pieces of paper.
VERNA you are the winner of the handmade journal by artist Kathleen Tennant and your choice of Visual Chronicles or Journal Revolution.
SHARMAINE you are the winner of your choice of any print from my shop.
Thank your for playing with us. I will email you both.

We both had lovely holiday weekends. I was in San Francisco with my husband, and Karen was with her family and the rest of our siblings, mom, cousins, and aunt and uncles in Oxnard. We were apart but-as always- both afflicted with the same problem: humidity ruined our hair. Distance never really separates sisters and hair issues. We were both in hotel bathrooms looking in the mirror in shock while texting each other. There's a lot that goes on with women in bathrooms and we're going to be telling some of those stories with our new book. Pamela Detlor has written a bit about it in her interview with singer/songwriter Jen Foster, who is featured in our book, Meeting In The Ladies Room. If you've been reading our blog for a while, Jen Foster should be no stranger to you. We are huge fans of her music. Pam is giving away Jen Foster's CD Thirty-Nine and other merchandise so if you aren't yet a fan, you soon will be. Comment there for your chance to win. Also, be sure to notice the awesome never-before-seen photos of Jen on Venice Beach taken by yours truly.

November always seems to bring new things for us in the same way New Years does for some people. I just wish it brought me more time to write about all the things that aren't really things.

thank you annoyance

November freaks me out. The sudden onset of thankfulness that lasts approximately 25 days and makes people gush about how fake happy they are about every tiny detail in their lives then promptly forget those tiny details right after the pie is served annoys me. The pie part doesn't annoy me. The marshmallow topped sweet potatoes don't annoy me either. I'm not even listening to Cherokee Nation on repeat as I write this, though in the spirit of Thanksgiving we all should listen to that.
Isn't part of being alive being aware that you are alive and not just in November? How do you be alive every day and not be thankful?I swear I wake up every morning totally shocked that I am not dead. Given our luck, it's really amazing. My alarm goes off and I am all Oh My Buddha! I am totally fucking alive! I might have time to watch all the episodes of Glee that I recorded! And there are cookies in the kitchen! BEST DAY EVER!  This happens every day of the year, not just November. My day NEVER goes as I think it will. I don't ever end up having time to watch the Glee marathon. Everywhere I go it takes a long time because something always happens and then I am aware and thankful for those things, even when they are annoying. Life would be so boring if nothing ever happened.  I am pretty sure the day I will have time to sit and watch my homemade Glee marathon will be the day my DVR will break. I'll be less thankful and more annoyed that day.  I think the Twenty-Five Days of Thankfulness gas that stores pump their their air vents has the opposite effect on me. It just makes me jumpy when the fake love starts oozing from people.
I totally would've sucked at living in the 60's.

*Before our relatives get all commenty: yes, we were BORN in the 60's but we weren't really living in the 60's if you get my drift.

there's a reason, dear

My husband has a bad case of food poisoning courtesy of a meal from Red Robin. He does get injured often but he's rarely sick. He doesn't seem to  ever get headaches or stomach aches, so when he is sick, he is really sick. A few years into our marriage, I woke one night to the horrid sight and sounds of him barfing into our bathtub. Not the toilet which was next to the bathtub, but in to the bathtub. It took a lot of bleach before I could ever set foot into that shower tub combo again. Who in the hell throws up into a bathtub intentionally? My husband, of course.  Being the loving wife that I am, I demanded to know what he was doing to my tub. He said he doesn't throw up in toilets. People go to the bathroom there. My husband is prissy about where he barfs. I am prissy about where I take a shower and where I do my dishes, so when he gets sick, I run to protect my showers and sinks.
Today while I was preparing drinks with straws and a cool cloth for Dustin's head, I was remembering the first time I got food poisoning. Perhaps I had it before that time, but this was the one I really remember. And I can't remember it without laughing until I cry. It was the summer of 1986  and boy was it hot. Karen and I were living in a one room apartment in Venice Beach and we had no air-conditioning. We had one bathroom. Our brother, Tod, was staying with us. Karen and I shared a double bed that was pushed up next to a wall. I slept on the wall side. Tod slept on a small couch. Like many other days that summer, we all bought  a ticket to see a movie and just stayed in the air-conditioned theater eating popcorn and Reese's Peanut Butter Cups all day. We saw a lot of movies in one day,many times. That day, Tod and I shared a packet of peanut butter cups and Karen had the popcorn. We went home when the sun went down and we went to bed. Hours later, I woke in a sweat with the worst stomach pains ever. I thought I was dying wedged between Karen and the wall. I was in too much pain to toss and turn and was afraid if I did either of those things I might explode in the bed. I laid there still. Sweating. And then I heard the sounds I'll never forget. Oh my God. Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh my God. Oh Shit. It didn't sound like my voice but those were my thoughts. Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh my GOD!!!!! Make way!
Tod was moaning on the coach, tossing and turning like a sky on a stormy night. He bolted from the couch, tripped over his shoes, and started undressing on his way to the single toilet in our apartment. The toilet I really needed to use, if only I could toss myself over Karen. If only I could beat him to the bathroom. If only I could move. Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh my GOD! Oh shit. He slammed the bathroom door. Oh shit. Oh shit. I am dying! Oh shit.
 My hands were clutching my own stomach as Tod's chant continued. I did not dare look at Karen (who was un-poisoned)  because I could not laugh hysterically while trying not to ruin the bed. Being the loving sister that I am, I demanded he hurry up because someone else needed to use the toilet, too.
Oh shit. Oh shit. I think those peanut butter cups were bad.
I have no idea how I made it out of the bed, but I did just as Tod was exiting. I'd never been so happy to see a toilet with a working flusher in my life.
There's a reason we barf in toilets, Dear.

little sweeties

I had such a good day today that I almost forgot how bad my hair looks. My camera and I had the honor and privilege of visiting the famous Hansen's Cakes of Beverly Hills  (yes, I went to Beverly Hills with Fang Hair) where I was treated like royalty and ate cake like it was my last day on this planet. A planet full of sweet, soft, delicious cake with just the right amount of frosting. Carrot cake, marble  with chocolate chip frosting, lemon coconut, chocolate mocha, sponge and strawberry, red velvet ~ each one better than the bite before it. Wait, was I dead and in heaven? I think so. There's frosting all over my camera so it must be true that I was really there!
I have posted a few photos of the deliciousness in my flickr. I am sure some of these sweeties will be making future appearances in some art and one of the sweeties from the cake team will be making an appearance in this little book* of ours.

If you need a cake or cupcakes for a special event or just because you have raging PMS and bad haircut and need some comforting, get in touch with the fine folks at Hansen's. You will not be sorry. You can even walk in off the street and get a nice big cupcake for less than $2. I love them. 

*Coming soon, very soon! Yay!

oh no you don't

Just some stuff~

*We have always been really fond of the Juicy Couture ad campaigns. We're not so fond of the clothes with JUICY on the butt, but the ad campaigns have always been really cool. Their new campaign has a great new slogan and it's plastered all over magazines, ads, and store walls and windows. And there's a huge ERROR that apparently not one person caught before everything was printed. Their slogan is DO THE DON'TS. Actually, their slogan is DO THE DONT'S. They put the apostrophe between the T and the S instead of between the N and the T, where it belongs. Hmmmm. Juicy People, DO THE PROOFING!

*Yesterday, I was out doing some shopping and when I got back to my car, the car next to me was parked way too close and I had to do that sideways maneuver to get in that  requires you toss your bags and purse in first then you try to edge in twisty shoulder first. I finally get in, I'm putting on my seat belt and BAM! BAM! BAM! I get the bejesus scared out of me by a crazy looking -frothy at the mouth-woman banging loudly on my driver's side window. She had a toddler in a stroller and was banging on my car and was fast and furiously rubbing a dirty HELP ME I AM HOMELESS AND NEED MONEY sign all over my window. I have no idea how she fit in the space between the two cars with her stroller. Maybe she was in the car next to mine. I don't know. She totally startled me with her sudden violent banging  so I banged back and told her to fuck off. I know, I know, not the most compassionate response. It's hard to be generous or compassionate when your heart is pounding out of your chest and you feel trapped. She moved on to another woman getting in her car. Of course I feel sorry for homeless moms (don't send me hate mail). In that moment, though, I was more scared than feeling sorry for anyone. If you want people to help you, don't scare the shit out of them.

*Our medical insurance no longer covers non-generic prescription medications. This is the lamest thing ever. Generic migraine medications do not work at all. The problem is you don't know this until you've been taking the placebo pills for a month and are dying of migraines and real migraine drug withdrawal. Pretty soon I am going to be banging on car windows with a sign that says HELP ME I HAVE A MIGRAINE.

black seeds

Little black seeds that resemble bugs are a bad idea in salads.  I think they are a bad idea in most foods, but especially so in salad. Bugs do live in lettuce. The Pasadena Salad from my Boyfriend Joe is really good but it takes 3 hours to eat it because you have to check to make sure each seed is not a flea, legless ant, or cockroach and after all that, you just aren't hungry anymore.

Swine flew

The other day I was listening to the radio and they had this report about swine flu. I was sort of interested and sort of not because I think I have only ever gotten the flu a couple times in my entire life. We both only ever get really bad strep throat and sinus infections and we get those regularly. I have never gotten a flu shot and was pretty convinced I'd not get the swine flu shot, too. The announcer sounded very excited about her next bit of reporting with NEW DETAILS!!! She had statistics that show that women do a much better job than men do of washing their hands, covering their mouths when they cough and sneeze,and in general not being gross.  Even though Karen was not in the car with me when I heard that report, I gave her the look. Well, duh. Even the cleanest man is gross. Have you ever lifted up the toilet seat where a man has peed? There is always pee on the seat. Always. Have you ever been in a waiting room anywhere full of mostly men? The sounds you hear will prevent you from eating ever again.
I am not going to get a swine flu shot. I am just going to avoid men.


*Photo by Dustin Woods