Last Friday, and odd dog with a dental problem appeared at our back door. His legs also stuck out every which way, like a badly drawn cartoon. If I didn't take pictures of the things that go on in my daily life, I am sure I would not believe half the stuff that happens. I started going door-to-door asking my neighbors if they were missing their sweet dog. The weird train kept on going. I noticed some interesting things:
~The majority of my neighbors do not have peepholes in their front doors. PEOPLE, you need a peephole! That is so dangerous. Do not answer your door without looking at who is knocking. How do you pretend you are not home if at first you come to the window and look out at who is knocking? The person at the door can see you.
~Not only did nobody have a peephole, they also either had no window coverings on their huge front windows or had sheers. I can tell you everything everyone had in their great rooms, including how many kids they have based on the family photos on their mantels. Does nobody remember Polly Klaas, Elizabeth Smart, or JonBenet Ramsey? Come on you guys, go to Target and get some curtains for the windows that face the street.
~Most men who are home at 10:30 AM answered their doors half-dressed. I can safely say my husband is the hottest in the 'hood. Put your clothes on before answering the door, it's not that difficult to say hang on a second and grab a shirt. I am scarred for life. Bras for men might be a good thing afterall.
~Despite sharing a fence with us for 13 years -and despite our house being bright yellow with a red door in a sea of beige -and despite me always being outside, three of the neighbors that share a fence with us had never seen me before and were totally baffled by my existence. One of those neighbors being the ball tossers. The other being the house where I think the mom is a blogger and her desk window faces our kitchen. The other house had a cute guy in it who was dressed so I am going to let him off the hook. He actually helped me try to find the dog's owner. Anyway, the fact that nobody has noticed me for 13 years is pretty damn good. I actually AM invisible! Well, it's weird, but it's good. If people can't see you, they can't complain.I'm not going to worry about my music being too loud.
~Everyone has stacks of magazines and mail on their counter and everyone has multiple remotes for their TV.
You can learn a lot about people by standing in their doorway for a minutes...a good reason to never answer your door when a stranger comes knocking, unless you see them holding your dog.
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