I care about the planet as much as it's convenient for me. I try not to waste water (or be wasteful in general), we drive cars with good gas mileage, we use energy efficient appliances. We use those ridiculous low-energy light bulbs in rooms where seeing things doesn't matter even though they don't really last longer and have not ever lowered our bills. We recycle our paper, plastics, and aluminum even though that is not at all convenient. Instead of having bins of cookies in my kitchen I have bags if different types of garbage. The bags of garbage bug me. Still, despite the even thoughs, we do it.
Pam is the type of woman who expects answers. She has fiery red hair and deep blue eyes and she looks right at you when she talks to you so you know it's not a one-sided conversation. We'd known each other for a few years before she came to visit last month and I was pretty sure I knew most things about her daily life. We worked on the Ladies Room Book together and emailed every day, of course I knew everything. I knew she loved coca-cola and Big Macs, the important stuff.
Near the beginning of her stay, we were cleaning up from a meal and instead of scraping her plate into the disposal as I do daily without thinking, she looked at me with those eyes and asked me where my compost bin is.
WHAT?! What compost bin? McDonald's Pam is actually Earth Mother Pam? Pam just asked me where my compost bin is like it's unusual not to have one. She's an opposite! Oh My Buddha. How did I not know she was a composter? Compost with WORMS?! I blacked out for a second so I am not sure what I said but I think it sounded like UM, UH, UM WOOL... and I put the food down the disposal. And right there in my own kitchen, under Pam's blue eyes, I felt like the Queen of Earth Ruiners. Pam's not the judging type (she's the laughy type) , that much I knew, but I thought for sure she wasn't the composting type either.
People in California always say they are going to move to Canada when things like gay marriage laws don't pass. Canada is beautiful and the people are nice and it's pretty much just like America but they have cute accents, health care is free, and gay marriage is legal. And in Toronto, where Pam lives, garbage disposals are called garburators and they are prohibited in certain areas. People there MUST compost! They HAVE TO! And tampons and pads (Things With Wings!) are considered a luxury item and are taxed more.
Our garbage disposal broke this weekend. And I am PMSy. I'm not ever moving to Canada.
*We've already replaced our disposal.
[note: Pam was totally not used to not composting which made me laugh every time she sorted trash! It was so funny and unexpected (and cute)! Traveling to other countries is so fun.This is way better than the stories people have of me and Karen: those two sisters could not figure out how to flush our toilets here. Just pull the cord while stepping on the pedal, girls....]
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