I always think it is so weird when people say they'd pay to see me or Karen drunk. I have no idea what people think I would do or say when drinking that I don't do now. Would I swear more? Support more liberal causes? Would I make more art with products full of chemicals and acid? Would I maybe take more photos of food before I eat it? I don't know what the excitement would be and I don't think anyone will really find out because I don't drink. I may have a glass of wine here or there but that is about it. I prefer my sedation in pill form, cookie form, and forms that don't taste like Robitussin. The other day I sarcastically twittered that perhaps I shouldn't blog after my surgery because I might swear or something while doped up on pain killers. Many people emailed that they'd love for me to blog while on drugs. Your wish has been granted.
It's 10:03 on Wednesday night and I am fucked up.
My face is a bruised and swollen mess. I have had the annoying and ill-fitting flipper in my mouth for 6 hours and want to smash it with a hammer. It doesn't fit right and I know my dentist thinks it is the drugs and swelling talking, but the angle of it is all wrong which I will prove with photos and a diagram when I go back in a few days when the swelling has gone down and the fake tooth flipper is still wrong in my mouth. If there's one thing I know, it's a bad angle. I'm willing to bet that the maker of the flipper has a house full of crown molding and baseboards all cut at the wrong corner angles. The dentist kindly informed me that my dental insurance denied my claim for the flipper so for $400, I want a fake tooth thing that looks and feels right for 6 months until I get the real fake tooth. Right now, it's just making me drool. Well, drool while being annoyed. Annoyed, fucked up and slow.
It's taken me a long time to write this. Partly because it hurts to look at anything and partly because the world is in slow motion at the moment, so when I do look around I have to stop and go uh wait, ok wait... uh... uh...uh...wait.
Thanks for all your well wishes and support. I did get all your emails and just haven't had a chance to respond. THANK YOU!!! Double thanks to everyone who emailed me and told me what this procedure was really going to be like. WOW. Choose the IV sedation, people.
**UPDATE** Day two is worse. And, here's the MOFO flipper.
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